fleeting questions?

3 Feb

How do you deal with a million memories that refuse to go away? Memories that sear through your mind, red hot, awakening every nerve, every repressed emotion.

How do you look someone in the eye, your heart breaking, and tell them you feel their pain, knowing well that nothing you have gone through, better or worse, it can never compare to how they feel?

How do you face another day, when all you ache for is the sweet sleep of oblivion? When in the end, all that matters is nothing?

How do you face your anger? Your pain? Your helplessness? Your frustration?

How do you turn around and walk away from walking away? When your only hope is to know that somehow, someday it will make sense?

And why doesn’t it ever make sense, when you most desperately need it to? When your heart yearns for a semblance of redemption?

Why do we exist in the first place, if our purpose is simply to move on? What then becomes our purpose in the here, and in the now?

What is life?

And why is it so fleeting?

—

RIP Brenda Nsangi.

—

Audio: Lene Marlin – A Place Nearby

—

Offtopic:

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glint on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you wake in the morning hush,
I am the swift, uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft starlight at night.

Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there, I did not die!

- Mary Frye (1932)

People who looked at this item also looked at…

Related items

19 Responses to “fleeting questions?”

  1. Mr. B2B... 03. Feb, 2009 at 12:46 pm #

    yeah mate
    i hear you!

    Mr. B2B…’s last blog post..QuotingTime13

    Reply
  2. jny23ug 03. Feb, 2009 at 12:52 pm #

    Brenda’s death is such a shocker.

    R.I.P. young lady.

    Reply
  3. igiss 03. Feb, 2009 at 1:00 pm #

    Just read about Brenda at Cheri’s :-( Life is a biatch

    igiss’s last blog post..Am I doing something wrong?

    Reply
  4. Miss Cheri 03. Feb, 2009 at 1:09 pm #

    Man, it’s true, u live once and life aint no dress rehearsal.

    RIP Brenda

    Reply
  5. Ashy 03. Feb, 2009 at 2:17 pm #

    Beautiful tribute, may her soul rest in peace.

    Reply
  6. normzo 03. Feb, 2009 at 3:05 pm #

    May her soul rest in Peace

    normzo’s last blog post..Howzat Umpire!??

    Reply
  7. jasmine 03. Feb, 2009 at 4:29 pm #

    i know this morning i told you i was going to get up today and do those things i keep saying i will do, mostly in honor of Brenda, and how life can suddenly slip through our fingers, but i haven’t. i’m just so sad! all these bad feelings rising up again and refusing to go down so here i am my dear friend, paralyzed again.
    i must call my friend but what words of comfort will i have for her? we’ll probably just end up crying and asking why? why? why? why?…
    when you find answers to those questions, let me know.

    Reply
  8. scotchie 03. Feb, 2009 at 5:16 pm #

    I love that poem!!
    I hope the inner chaos subsides and you start to feel comforted, hugged…and everything else you need to get through this.
    hugs!!!

    Reply
  9. lulu 03. Feb, 2009 at 5:50 pm #

    I KNOW, I SO KNOW, NO MORE…I CANT SAY MORE

    lulu’s last blog post..confessions of a lost visionary

    Reply
  10. Teti 03. Feb, 2009 at 7:21 pm #

    R.I.P Brenda.

    Teti’s last blog post..Ooops!

    Reply
  11. Edward Matovu 03. Feb, 2009 at 7:25 pm #

    I think the life now is to prepare us for the life then.

    Beautiful tribute. Powerful poem.

    Edward Matovu’s last blog post..Happy Belated New Year!

    Reply
  12. gwen 04. Feb, 2009 at 5:23 am #

    I move those lousy thoughts into another place and move on. The trick is to catch them early before they acquire power.

    gwen’s last blog post..The 109 Day Link Building Explosion – Day 34

    Reply
  13. Philbert Atwendeza 09. Feb, 2009 at 11:17 am #

    Surely, the poem speaks alot.
    Life can be so short!! Being young should not blind us to live less of our lives. You did this so well.
    Your memories will remain alive with us.
    Even with death, you still have the love of God. Nothing can ever separate anyone from that love.
    Brenda RIP.

    Reply
  14. Theresa Sengooba 03. Mar, 2009 at 4:07 pm #

    Brenda, I love and always will. Gods decided it was best for you to go when you did. We shall never know why but gosh it hurts!! Thanks for the so many friends. We are praying hard that you be in haeven till we meet…mum

    Reply
  15. Nansukusa Stella 04. Mar, 2009 at 3:38 am #

    Brenda, the blanks are so many and no one can ever fill them. We miss so much,we will always love. All we have are the precious memories. We know you are with God. Rest in peace my love. Stella

    Reply
  16. Geofrey Were 23. Mar, 2009 at 4:03 pm #

    Now this is really scarly.

    Eh one sermon that i vividly remember, the Revrand said “….when i die, never inscribe onto my grave ‘The Late’

    Reply
  17. Geofrey Were 23. Mar, 2009 at 4:06 pm #

    Since he claims on the day Jesus promised to come for his people, he will be there coz thats what the bible says. Those who die in him will raise up and meet him even before those who will be alive but leaving in Him.

    Reply
  18. maria j 04. Aug, 2009 at 2:20 pm #

    i miss u so much.

    Reply
  19. nakitens 29. Mar, 2010 at 12:00 am #

    Brenda the gap you left can’t be replaced
    may your soul rest in eternal peace

    Reply

Leave a Reply